King of the Gove



Free schools for sale or rent,

Fields to flog – fifty pence.

My policy’s a mess…

You don’t need no QTS!

Ah but… two hours with Laws and Truss

Makes the… teachers of the country cuss!

I’m a man who makes teens go gre-en;

King of the Gove.


Watch Stephen Twigg kow-tow…

Opposition? Don’t know how!

The ebacc’s coming soon,

3 hour ‘xams at the end of June… you’ll do

Maths til you’re 35 –

School attendance takes a dive! If our

PISA score is pristine, I’m

King of the Gove.


Clocks back to ’53…

Suck my ideology!

Wilshaw is my lapdog;

OFSTED lurking in the fog… ah but

Twelve hours of marking work

And you almost can forget the berk…

Until… Aarrgh! He’s back on TV-ee!

King of the Gove.


See my apology to my

French teacher (his name’s Danny)?

I was a clever dick… now I

Make the whole profession sick!

And so, you say it’s time I went;

#govemustgo is your lament. But I

Have some more decrees! I’m

King of the Gove!


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